Force Majeure   11 comments

Forewarned, yet could not see
That foretold would come to be
If God could act, but not this scene
Though force be strong, no actions seen

Acts are done beyond my ken
Yet still I strive to pierce this glen
Child at heart in flesh of man
Deeds long past, but flash in pan

Is there force that guides this life
Then free me from this toil and strife
Major hand, clutch minor soul
Pierce this breast, sharp pain the toll

What drives this life with hand unseen
Ignore the child, become the teen
This force majeure, from points unknown
Sees the growth from seeds yet sown

Image borrowed from Google images

11 responses to “Force Majeure

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  1. we face countless one-way doors every day of our lives; and when we go through one, we face countless more. sometimes it feels like a guiding hand is gently pushing me toward a door and sometimes it feels like the guiding hand has shoved me through one. Or is it just me, tripping over my own petard?

  2. I always question the preponderance of fate to the power of choice. Your beautiful words only heighten my curiosity. :-)

  3. Anything I can do to increase your already bountiful curiosity Is a task I am ready for, and happy to perform. :-)

  4. Thank goodness you’re back…I’ve missed you and this :)

  5. A gorgeous poem for a gorgeous picture. It often does seem that growing up can be as mad and life-shattering as a for I know poem structures are a bit more nebulous in order to grant the appropriate pauses, but you do seem to be a little comma-happy in this one, Cap’n. E.g. “That foretold, would come to be” doesn’t need the comma for grammatical purposes, and just the rhythm of the words allows for a natural pause in the mind or aloud. The first three lines of the second and are the same along with the first two of the third, and the first and fourth lines from the last stanza. I think my favorite lines are

    “Child at heart, in flesh of man
    Deeds long past, but flash in pan”

    It’s such an eloquent way of describing not only our flashbulb memories, but the relative import of events in our lives. Things that seemed so important to me when I was six still influence the child in me, but they’re just moments. Flashes in the pan that shine so brightly and yet they fade at the edges over time like old photographs. Of course, the theme of fate that runs through a lot of your poems and stories is equally compelling, though. I don’t believe in it, personally, but it’s a fascinating concept and so many events seem fated to happen, certainly many of those that lead us to be the people we are.

    • Oh sure, bring “rules” into it. ;-) Commas, like so much of the writing process other than the actual words, continue to vex and annoy me with my misunderstanding. I know what I want to say, but grammar, punctuation etc, I have people for that. I don’t actually, but I should. :-) The only thing I remember about commas (and I hope this is correct) is that you place them in a sentence where there is a pause in speaking. I have absolutely no idea when it comes to natural pauses due to the rhythm and flow of a piece, as opposed to a simple pause. I’m going to peruse it again and make a few modifications, let me know if I got it right or tanked the whole ‘rule thing’ again.

      There, I, think, I, fixed, it, take, a, look, and, let, me, know, what, you, think.

    • Oh, and another thing….. :-) As far as the whole fate thing, I tend to write to express a thought, idea or theme that pops into my head, and I often repeat the theme different ways with different characters to get a feel for it or how a different view would change what I’m trying to say. The themes, emotions and to some extent the events, can at a base level be taken from my life, but the poetic or written thread is pretty much made up, like the characters. Whether I believe in fate or not, (and that’s a secret you’ll have to find out on your own :-) ), it’s the characters and stories that seem to repeat, not my particular views or thoughts. With the caveat being, a lot of what I write expresses what I am, but not who I am. There, clear as mud?

  6. Wow, to both your writing AND the picture! Perfect title, too. *smile* I read the comment about your commas with tongue in cheek, because my GN didn’t see anything (of course, you had edited before I got here, and it looks great now, imho). The only “nit” I might pick is to put a question mark at the end of your question “What drives this life with hand unseen?”, but that’s a minor nit compared with the greatness of the piece. :) I agree with Jo, it’s good to have you back, Cap’n!

    • Thanks, glad you liked both! I’m never sure about punctuation and such at the end of a line. I used to put a comma there, but took them away. Not sure about putting a question mark at the end of a line in a poem, even though I would do so in a story were it warranted.

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